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I just had to get on and write today as something wonderful happened. I came home this afternoon from a long day of testing homeschoolers with my Mom and saw a small package in my mailbox. Instantly I thought of my greatly anticipated bracelet. I waited to open the package
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I am excited about Easter coming. I am actually surprised that I can write that as I am also anticipating a very hard time that day. I was planning (whether a realistic expectation or not I am not sure) that Emma would be joining us in church Easter Sunday. Even
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Thank you all for praying. I have been doing a bit better lately, but sometimes I wonder if it is because I seriously am progressing, or if I am just repressing things. I do know that God did give me some good thoughts that helped to counteract the feelings of
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OK, I have been putting off posting because I guess I am not wanting to write what I am feeling. But, I know that you all are faithful to pray and if I want prayers for what I am going through than I must tell you how I am doing.
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Hello all. John and I are doing well the last few days. This weekend we spent some time together as a family and with my family hiking. Elise really enjoyed the time. Saturday we went together to Wal-Mart and bought new paint for Elise's room (as well
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Good news! We got TEFRA for Emma. I received her new medicaid number in the mail yesterday as well as a phone call from DHS. For those of you who didn't hear what TEFRA is, it is a program to get medicaid to disabled children whose parents wouldn&
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I haven't posted in awhile, because it is hard for me to know right now what to post. I am overwhelmed right now by a lot of conflicting emotions and haven't even felt the strength many days to process things. For those of you that saw
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Emma's geneticist called me personally today. He said that Emma's FISH test (the second blood test) came back with nothing remarkable. The skin cells (we had asked them to take a skin sample the day of Emma's death and send it to the genetics
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I have determined that for now grief comes in waves. Every week, in fact every day, is different. Some days I am emotional and very close to tears, the next day I am very much in control and can't even cry that much even if I want to.
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I am feeling very sad today. This wave of sadness began yesterday when I suddenly became very angry unexpectedly while tearing up a piece of paper. I lost it and started crying and just telling God that I want Emma back. I know I can't have her back
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We had a very good relaxing weekend. I actually didn't even cry that much. But Sunday for some reason was hard for me and today is also a little bit hard. Mostly I am just feeling tired and a little irritable. I am going to try to take
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I wanted to post today to let you know how I am feeling and becuase I know that this helps me to process things. Since the memorial services the days have been harder for me. Well, actually it is the nights. Most of the day I am fine, though sad.