Anticipation.

I am finding that the anticipation of our visit with the cardiologist next week is affecting me.  I am missing Emma in a much more real way.  It is like stepping back into her world for just a bit and that is hard.  I sat down for a little yesterday and wondered how it would be.  What would bring tears to my eyes?  Will seeing the doctors face?  Will seeing the other children in the waiting room, many of them on oxygen, do so?  What will I say if some friendly parent decides to ask me why we are there?  Will I feel lost in the hospital without Emma, or will it still feel like the second home it was for me for so long?  Don't get me wrong, I am not really dreading it, but just viewing it with a bit of nervousness.  I don't want to dwell on it too much, but I do want to be prepared as it is going to be hard and I am just beginning to glimpse maybe how hard.  Please keep us in your prayers on Thursday.  The appointment is at 2:00.